emo trip is shit

I dont know why im getting emotional/sentimental more and more everyday. i dont think it comes with the friends coz they make me happy... special someone perhaps?? i dont know. i know he's special... there must be something in the air. the weird thing about this is, its not even february (technically the love month.) i think my heart is on permanent 'crushed mode'. It feels like its always broken. if i get an x-ray, i think it would look EXACTLY like this. i need to have a working heart you know.

but i think this emo trip will pass. i think this is all due to the fact that i watch a lot of sappy movies/shows. i've been catching up on tagalog movies all of a sudden, like the movie One More Chance. Its like the best love story movie of all the freaking time. It made a benchmark on my category of movies. its never a good love story unless it tramps One More Chance. SERIOUSLY. what movie do you get lines like these:

"mahal na mahal kita, kahit ang sakit sakit na..." -AWTS!

"she loved me at my worst, you had me at my best yet you chose to break my heart.." -AWTS again!

"kagustuhan ko naman ito di ba? bakit ako ang nasasaktan ng sobra,a lam mo lagi ko pa ding sinasabi sana ako, sana ako nalang, sana ako nalang ulit.." - SUPER AWTS

finally!

i miss the blogging world! i felt a sudden jolt of excitement! i am now internet-enabled! at ang globe ang enabler ko! LOL!

so much has happened to me these months, and i cant even begin where to start. To say the least, career-wise ive grown, from a lowly agent to a cooltastic trainer. Honestly, i never imagined myself as a trainer, or as an educator for that matter. i was always a chatter but ive never had the patience to actually teach stuff to people. Up to now, i dont know where im getting my patience from... must be divine intervention. or im getting older and i have more understanding of things?? either way, i love it. and im actually enjoying it.

emotionally... im trying to be stable. trying to cope. trying... trying... trying... there are times when i think that this is my karma for being such a bee-atch! suffer the life of singledom! LOL! its just that, im afraid to actually fall again. because God knows how miserable i felt my heart got broken. so if you, however you are out there, who actually feels some love for me, can you take it slow? please act out if you're 10000000000000000% sure. i cant bear another heartache. i'll simply die.

till next time!